"That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my (expletive) clothes."
Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker.

"I just tape four Tylenols to it."
Edmonton’s Boris Mironov, on playing with a sore ankle.

"We take the shortest route to the puck and arrive in ill humor."
Bobby Clarke.

"One road trip we were stuck on the runway for seven hours. The plane kept driving and driving until we arrived at the rink and I realized we were on a bus."
Glenn Healy, on his IHL time.

"Or as hockey player Sergei Fedorov knows it, 'The day I can legally start telling everyone I am sleeping with Anna Kournikova.'"
On the "Late, Late Show with Craig Kilborn," Kilborn noted Monday was Anna Kournikova's 18th birthday..

"Part of the learning curve in Edmonton is learning to hate Calgary."
Steve Smith.

"As always, I remain hopeful that Don Cherry won’t be offered the same length contract."
Broadcaster Ron MacLean, on his four year contract renewal.

"I have to thank the guy who fired me because he was also the guy who hired me."
Serge Savard, on his firing from Montreal.

"Hockey captures the essence of Canadian experience in the New World. In a land so inescapably and inhospitably cold, hockey is the chance of life, and an affirmation that despite the deathly chill of winter we are alive."
Stephen Leacock.