Yo momma's so ugly,
when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."

Yo momma's so ugly,
she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning.

Yo momma's so ugly,
just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."

Yo momma's so ugly,
they push her face into dough to make cookies.

Yo momma's so ugly,
they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower

Yo momma's so ugly,
they didn't give her a costume when she auditioned for Star Wars.

Yo momma's so ugly,
instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck

Yo momma's so ugly,
when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras

Yo momma's so ugly,
her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her

Yo momma's so ugly,
her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dog to play with her.

Yo momma's so ugly,
the government moved Halloween to her birthday.

Yo momma's so ugly,
they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.

Yo momma's so ugly,
she made an onion cry.

Yo momma's so ugly,
when she went to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote!

Yo momma's so ugly,
when she tried to take a bath, the water jumped out!

Yo momma's so ugly,
even Rice Krispies won't talk to her!

Yo momma's so ugly,
on Halloween the kids trick or treat her by phone!

Yo momma's so ugly,
she turned Medusa to stone!

Yo momma's so ugly,
people go as her to Halloween parties.

Yo momma's so ugly,
I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.

Yo momma's so ugly,
that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.