05andrew
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Jan 7, 2006, 8:16 PM
Post #1 of 1
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 If You Had What I Have  A guy runs into a bar and says, "Bartender, quick! Give me 20 shots of your best Scotch!"
So the bartender lines up 20 shots of his best Scotch and watches this guy down one after the other.
"Man," the bartender says, "I've never seen anyone drink shots that fast!"
"You'd drink them that fast too if you have what I have," the guy says.
"Oh my God," says the bartender, "what do you have?"
"50 cents."
ok some more
Cloak & Dagger A soldier at the Pentagon got out of the shower, and realized that his clothes were missing. Then he accidentally locked himself out of the locker room.
He was now completely naked in the halls of the headquarters of the most powerful military organization on the planet. And he felt pretty ridiculous.
Getting an idea, he walked naked and purposefully through the corridors until he reached the Research & Development laboratory. He walked in and saluted the Head Scientist.
"I am here to report the partial success of the personal invisibility device!"
more more
Would You Marry Again, Scummy? A husband and wife were golfing when suddenly the woman asked, "Honey, if I died would you get married again?"
The man said, "No dear."
The woman said, "I'm sure you would."
So the man said, "Okay, I would"
Then the woman asked, "Would you let her sleep in our bed?"
And the man replied, "Ya, I guess so."
Then the woman asked, "Would you let her use my golf clubs?"
And the man replied, "No, she's left handed."
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