saldana1
Novice
Jul 8, 2006, 6:52 PM
Post #1 of 1
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When You Fly the Friendly Skies
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It had been a hard day for Marty, and his business meeting in Chicago had not gone well. He was in a surly mood as he stood in line to catch his plane back to L.A.
As he took his seat in the first class section of the plane, he noticed that there was a parrot in the seat next to him - strapped in and reading a Mad Magazine. As the plane taxied off the parrot kept laughing and snickering rather obnoxiously as he paged through his magazine.
When the stewardess finally came by to take the passengers’ orders for drinks, Marty ordered a Heineken and just then the parrot said in a loud voice, “Yeah, and get me a Jack Daniels, on the rocks, bitch!”
The stewardess was shocked, and she dropped everything to go to the galley and came back with the Jack Daniels. Marty told her politely (holding back his displeasure), “you forgot my Heineken, ma'am.”
The stewardess apologized profusely, and just as she turned to go get Marty’s beer, the parrot screamed out again, “Hey bitch, bring me another Jack Daniels, on the rocks.”
The stewardess, flustered even more, hurried back to the galley and returned with a Jack Daniels, in a couple of seconds - but no Heineken.
Again Marty reminded her that she had forgotten his beer and she apologized and promised she’d be right back with his beer. Just then however, the parrot yelled out, “Hey bitch, you forgot the ice in my drink - what are you going to do about it?”
The stewardess immediately brought the bird a small cup of ice. By this time Marty had had enough. The frustration that had been building all day at his meeting, and now with this damn parrot sitting next to him, got the best of him and he blurted out (observing to himself that it had worked for the offensive parrot), “You damn ugly bitch, get me my f***ing Heineken!”
The stewardess had had enough. She went back to the coach section of the plane and returned with two burly sky marshals who proceeded to forcibly remove both Marty and the parrot from their seats. They were taken to the back of the plane, where the freight door was opened, and Marty and the parrot were thrown out of the plane.
Falling rapidly towards the ground, Marty turned to the parrot and said, “You’ve got a lot of nerve; see the mess you and your foul mouth have gotten us into?”
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