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THE
JOKES & HUMOR eZINE ARCHIVES: JULY 2001
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24.07.01
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The
Comedy Zone Jokes & Humor eZine
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The
Comedy Zone Jokes & Humor eZine
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Joke
of the Day:
From
the Comedy Zone Joke Files
A man with a winking problem is applying for a position as a sales representative
for a large firm. The interviewer looks over his papers and says,
"This is phenomenal. You've graduated from the best schools; your recommendations
are wonderful, and your experience is unparalleled. Normally,
we'd hire you without a second thought. However, a sales representative has a
highly visible position, and we're afraid that your constant winking will scare
off potential customers. I'm sorry....we can't hire you."
"But wait,"
he said. "If I take two aspirin, I'll stop winking!"
"Really?
Great! Show me!"
So the applicant
reaches into his jacket pocket and begins pulling out all sorts of condoms: red
condoms, blue condoms, ribbed condoms, flavored condoms; finally, at the bottom,
he finds a packet of aspirin. He tears it open, swallows the pills, and stops
winking.
"Well,"
said the interviewer, "that's all well and good, but this is a respectable
company, and we will not have our employees womanizing all over the country!"
"Womanizing?
What do you mean? I'm a happily married man!"
"Well
then, how do you explain all these condoms?"
"Oh, that,"
he sighed. "Have you ever walked into a pharmacy, winking, and asked for
aspirin?"
Click
Here for more Funny Jokes
Silly
Fact of the Day:
Because
its tongue is too short for its beak, the toucan must juggle its food before swallowing
it.
Click
Here for more Fun Trivia
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Comedy
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The
Comedy Zone Jokes & Humor eZine
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For
more comedy check out these links:
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This is an Opt
in Maling List. Unsubscribe info at the bottom of this mailing.
|
The
Comedy Zone Jokes & Humor eZine
|
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|
Don't
forget to check out the latest
Comedy
Zone Funny Pictures
To visit CLICK
HERE
|
The
Comedy Zone Jokes & Humor eZine
|
Joke
of the Day:
From
the Comedy Zone Joke Files
A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After the man received the
full treatment - shave, shampoo, manicure, haircut, etc. - he placed the boy in
the chair.
"I'm goin'
to buy a green tie to wear for the parade," he said. "I'll be back in
a few minutes."
When the boy's
haircut was completed and the man still hadn't returned, the barber said, "Looks
like your daddy's forgotten all about you."
"That wasn't my daddy," said the boy. "He just walked up, took
me by the hand and said, 'Come on, son, we're gonna get a free haircut!'"
A
lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front
of a pet store. The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work.
On the way home she saw the same parrot and it said to her, "Hey lady, you
are really ugly."
She was incredibly mad now. The next day the same parrot again said to her, "Hey
lady, you are really ugly."
The lady was
so mad that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and
kill the bird.
The store manager replied, "That's not good," and promised he wouldn't
say it again.
When the lady
walked past the store that day after work the parrot called to her, "Hey
lady."
She paused
and said, "Yes?"
The bird said,
"You know."
Click
Here for more Funny Jokes
Silly
Fact of the Day:
U.S. Congressmen
expressed surprise on learning in 1977 that it takes 15 months of instruction
at the Pentagon's School of Music to turn out a bandleader, but merely 13 months
to train a jet pilot.
Click
Here for more Fun Trivia
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Comedy
Zone Humor Forum
To visit CLICK
HERE
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