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THE JOKES & HUMOR eZINE ARCHIVES: AUGUST 2001
03.08.01
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The Comedy Zone Jokes & Humor eZine

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Quote of the Day:
"My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money."
Joe Weinstein.

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Joke of the Day:
From the Comedy Zone Joke Files
A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out.
Her boss, concerned about his employee's well being, asks sympathetically, "What's the matter?"
The blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away."
"I'm terribly sorry to hear that. Why don't you go home for the day... we aren't terribly busy. Just take the day off to relax and rest."
The blonde very calmly explains, "No, I'd be better off here. I need to keep my mind off it and I have the best chance of doing that here."
The boss agrees and allows the blonde to work as usual. "If you need anything, just let me know," he says.
A few hours pass and the boss decides to check on the blonde. He looks out over his office and sees the blonde crying hysterically. He rushes out to her, and asks, "Are you going to be okay? Is there anything I can do to help?"
"No," replies the blonde, "I just got a call from my sister, and she said that HER mom died too!"

 

A blonde suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment that same day, with the gun in hand. Sure enough, when she opens the door, she finds her boyfriend in the arms of a redhead. She points the gun at her boyfriend at stares him down for a moment. Then, suddenly, she's overcome with grief, so she puts the gun up to the side her head.
Her boyfriend screams, "Honey, don't do it..."
The blonde yells back, "Shut up! You're next!"

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Silly Fact of the Day:
Clint Eastwood's "spaghetti westerns" marked the beginning of a new era in cinematic violence. About fifty people were killed in A Fistful of Dollars (1964).

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