In the great state of West -by God- Virginia where I was born the practice of in-breeding had reached almost epidemic proportions so it was determined that once a child reached breeding age he or she would be given an I.Q test to see if they were a "keeper" or not. Sure enough, once I reached the age of five I was given the test and as my luck would have it, I turned out to have the lowest I.Q score in the history of the state. Now the question was what to do with me? Some wanted to give me a one days head start then declare open season on rejects, others figured a good stoning might knock some sence into me, hell one raving lunatic wanted to throw me in a tater sack and heave me in the river to drown but my mother reminded him that the sack had been her wedding dress so father gave up that idea. Finally the wisest man in the whole darn state stepped forward with a plan. They shipped me across the border into Ohio and in doing so raised the average I.Q. score of BOTH STATES! Thanks Larz Bitchly
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