razza1
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Oct 16, 2005, 10:56 AM
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razzamatazz comedy website
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I'd just like to draw everyone's attention to my comedy website razzamatazz which
can be found at www.razza.fsnet.co.uk On the website you will find well over a thousand pages of good old British comedy (all the bad old foreign comedy having been filtered out, except for the Saddam Hussein's haemorrhoids/chilli suppository joke ).
DEAR 2000 is a compilation of letters about requests for information, letters of praise, but mostly letters of complaint, written by me, to around fifty different airline companies, and the subsequent correspondence between us. Some of the letters would appear to be beyond belief but I assure you they are 100% genuine. Anyone fond of lasagne or Les Dawson will love it.
DEAR COCA-COLA is in exactly the same vein as Dear Air 2000, but is correspondence to food manufacturing companies. Again all the letters are completely genuine, even the letters to Jacobs Bakery about the Jacobs Club Foot Biscuit.
STAR TERK TWO is a fifteen minute free download excerpt from my award-winning BBC radio series of the same name. Listen to all your old favourite Star Trek characters including Captain Kirk and Mr Spock - although for reasons that soon become obvious they begin their first mission as Captain Krik and Mr Pocks - as the intrepid crew once more do battle with syntax and creatures in outer space, including their old adversaries the Klingons, who even turn up one day on the Enterprise's starboard bow.
FOOTBALL CRAZY is a comic novel about Frogley Town, an extremely impoverished north of England football club who ply their trade in the lowest reaches of League Two. (England football coach Sven Goran Eriksson has probably never heard of them) The club takes on a new lease of life when it is taken over by local bigwig Joe Price of Price's Pies. Lots of sex, chicanery, heartache and moaning, but very few goals.
A GOOD WALK SPOILED is a comic novel about the noble game of golf. The action takes place on Captain's Day at Sunnymere Golf Club as the members vie with each other to win the prestigious Captain's Prize. Features lots of nudity, deaths, sex, drugs and rock and roll. Oh, and there's a bit of golf in it too.
KREEEGANS is the comic story, in screenplay format, of the visit to Earth by five aliens from the planet Kreeeg. Their planet is dying and it is the Kreeegans mission to find a new world they can inhabit. The planet Earth is on the short list. They very soon begin to wish it was on the long list.
ODDS AND SODS is a compendium of British comedy, around fifty comic items, sketches, spoofs, stories, games, crosswords, cod advertisements, roadmaps, menus, etcetera. Fun for all! Note - the item called By Kind Permission Of Peter Kay is not by kind permission of Peter Kay.
BRIAN BROADSIDE Brain-cell challenged Brian Broadside is Britain's most bigoted man. Think Harry Enfield's self-righteous brothers, add a touch of Adolf Hitler and a soupcon of Oswald Mosley and you have Brian in a nut shell. He should be in a nut house. But it takes all sorts, as they say.
THE REAL ADRIAN MOLE is the diary of another, more realistic adolescent than the other Adrian Mole, who the Real Adrian Mole would probably call a wet, whinging twannock. Like the other Adrian Mole he is obsessed with the size of his penis but unlike the other Adrian Mole he decides to do something about it. Adrian is a big fan of Peter Kay.
SVEN'S WORLD CUP DIARY is the log of England football coach Sven Goran Eriksson during the run-up to the 2006 World Cup Finals (if by some strange quirk of fate we get there). The writing skills of the shag-happy Swede are about as good as his football tactics skills so don't expect anything too illuminating.
CISSIE AND ADA is a collection of some of the scripts I wrote for Les Dawson when I worked for him as a scriptwriter during the years 1978 to 1983, originally on two series of the BBC's 'The Dawson Watch' and thereafter on three series of 'The Les Dawson Show'.
THE OYFORD ENCYCLOPEDIA is a one thousand entry reference book containing entries such as 'Effing Forest - Epping Forest when one is walking through it and bangs one's head on an overhanging branch.' and 'Embarrassing Hair - Hair which shouts "Hoy, Fatty!" to passers by and generally behaves in an uncouth and uncivilised manner.'
THAT OTHER PETER KAY is a collection of scripts written in the style of the Bolton comedian. If you like Peter Kay you'll like this.
TERRY'S WEBLOG is self-explanatory, a daily diary of my life and how I see things. Very dull, I don't know why anybody bothers reading it, especially the February 26 entry.
Terry Ravenscroft
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