A Doctor wanted to get off work to play golf, so he approached his Irish assistant, Paddy. "I am going golfing tomorrow Paddy and I don't want to close the clinic. I'd like you to take care of the clinic and look after all our patients" "Yes, sir!" answers Paddy. The doctor goes off to golf and returns the following day. He asks, "So, Paddy, how was your day?" Paddy told him that he took care of three patients. "The first one had a headache so I gave him Panadol." "Bravo! And the second one?" asks the doctor. "The second one had stomach burning and I gave him Aspirin". "Excellent. You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the doctor. "Well, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters. Like a woman possessed, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table, spreading her legs and shouts: "HELP ME! For five years I haven't seen a man!'" "Good God“, says the doctor, “What did you do?" "I put drops in her eyes"